To the World's Greatest Mom

I wish to tell you how much I love you mom! Although I cant remember the last time I told you this, I know action speaks louder than words... And hopefully Ill have the courage to tell you how I feel. For now, I hope this works...

During my highschool days, I must admit, I envied my classmates' moms because they were all supportive to them. They are soft spoken, womanly and always gives us a sweet smile. At that moment, I always wanted my mom to be like them. Like a typical mom... But now that I have grown up I realized I do not want a typical mom... I love you the way you are, youre more than ordinary..

You washed jeepney when we were young, you do other's laundry, you sell fish, you owned sari-sari store, you fix the faucet when its broken, electric wires when not working... and you helped dad to raise us up. You struggled to have all of us finish our college. I thought that would be the end of my list of how wonderful you are.. but not...

I broke the biggest news last year... I called you up when I learned that I was HIV Positive... I heard you broke into tears... but I was steadfast. I dont want you to hear the sound of my shattering soul. Not because I was HIV positive but because.... I heard you cry... and this time because of me. You didnt blamed me. Instead, you welcome me with youre loving arm...

That is the day when I died because of the news, and you made me live again through your love.

Now, you wake me up to take my medicines. You cook healthy foods for me... even at times you do not feel well. You made me feel your love more than ever. Overwhelming.

Now it is payback time. We are all successful professionals and we, will ensure that you will have a better life than what we used to have. I will try to give you everything that you want. I will dress you up with fine clothes, with perfumes and jewels. All because you deserve that. I OWE EVERYTHING THAT I HAVE NOW BECAUSE OF YOU. I owe you more than my life's worth. I love you right after GOD.

The word LOVE will not be enough to define how I am thankful to GOD because I have you. You are especially crafted for us. You are not the typical mom... you are unique. YOU ARE YOU.

You are the BEST.

Planet Romeo

Yesterday I decided to create a planet romeo account. Primarily because I want the people to know that this virus exist and this is just around the community. Your classmate, friends, partner, family or even YOU may already have caught one.

Naalala ko lang nung panahon na nalaman ko kung paanu ko nalaman na meron ako. Wala ako ka ide-idea na meron na ako. I was never sick. I cant even remember the last time that I have been feeling unwell even simple colds. Wala talaga ako nararamdaman ng kung anu ano. And because I started to hear some advocacies about the test, I just gave it a try... I also had my share of irresponsibilities, I guess lahat naman tayo at some point in our lives e nakagawa ng isang bagay na hindi masyado pinagiisipan, kaso ako... ayun, BINGGO. Until now I am still thinking if I did the right thing because it really affeted me emotionally. I want to have my own family, or kahit magkaanak man lang. Ayoko din tumanda magisa. These are some of the things  that I still  have in my mind right now...
EVEN AFTER A YEAR OF BEING DIAGNOSED.

Another reason why I created the account is to compensate for my deficiencies. Magpapakatotoo na ako, you may hate me, but I cannot divulge my identity to those that I date. I dont have the strentgh to tell that I am positive. The reason is that I am afraid that it backfires to my family, not to me... I cant trust this kind of stigma associated virus to anyone na madulas lang e sira na ang buhay ng pamilya ko.. I also think na mas nakakatakot pa ang mga hindi alam ang status nila dahil sila ang may mas malaking chances to infect.  I believe that this kind of sickness is shared responsibility, the reason why I did not searched for the possible person whom I caught this, Do not expect that people who tested positive are all heroes that they will deprive themselves of their needs just to protect you. I hate it when they call themselves victims, Hello! nung ginawa nyo yun dalawa kayo may gusto hehe.Isa pa, I take my pills (which reduces the chance of transmission of  more than 90%) and I never have sex without condoms. Ok, that being said, ako na matapang sa mga mapanghusgang pwedeng magbasa nito, dahil I know there are positives who does but does not tell. Why do I put this in my blog, I WANT YOU NON POSITIVES TO NOT TO DEPEND ON POZZIES FOR YOUR HEALTH. TAKE CHARGE.

AYoko maging plastik, nung nalaman ko na ganito ako hindi naging bato ang puso ko. ako pa rin yung dating ako mula nung bata hanggang ngaun. Nasasaktan, nalulungkot at ayaw matrato na parang isang salot. I am very productive and I decided to do this blog to help.

Hay ang bigat.

Anyways I received a message yesterday sa PR and I wanted to share it with you:

alam mo gusto kita makilala gusto ko malaman pinag dadaanan mo,,, wala man akong sakit ng gaya ng sayo... di naman ako yung natatakot mag karoon ng ganyang karamdaman,, ang sa akin eh magawa ko kung ano ang masaya ako.. tama ka isang beses lang nabubuhay ang isang tao.. kaya na sa sa iyo na yun kung paano mo ito gagamitin... lagi ko babasahin diary mo.. you makes me inspired di ko alam kung paano o kung saan.

SALAMAT SAYO. ikaw ang dahilan kung bakit naglakas loob ako na ilabas na itong part ng nasa isip ko.

Yours,

Potchini2